The Ferocious Benzilla's Fantabulous Church Of Unedited Ever-lovin' Funk


So, here I am. This is my first attempt at a web page. It's not bad considering this program. It's a hassle, and I can't do much of what I know other programs will let me. Here I am anyway! I'm trying here. It's not easy, you know. People have flashing lights, and movies, and farm animals on their sites. All I have is this lame-assed text! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!? Enjoy my humble attempt at your acceptance, ya ungrateful jerk!

Well, I don't really have much of a purpose for this just yet, however, I need to make amends for something...
Maya, Baby, I know you couldn't get that picture before, but now you can see it whenever you want!


It's not sausages, and it ain't no ball park franks, it's...


Now's your chance to visit the sexiest site on the web! Try my One True Love's Page page. Yes, my little Babuskas all over the globe, Maya is the one for me. Thank you, Baby, for teaching me that love is like a Rubix Cube. The idea is easy enough, but once you sit down to do it, it may take you many weekends to figure out. But oh the joys of puzzle solution!!! She lives far away. About 400 miles away, and while my New Yorker is quite the beast, it's not quite a 1987 Buick GNX oooooh yeah! So I go to college at DVC, and I work for Blockbuster, right? So check out some flicks, Genius. And when you're done with that, check out my favorite flick: Army of Darkness. Finally, some words of advice. I got this gang with my friend Jared out in Michigan. It's the D.F.O. (Denny's Food Organization) He and I have come up with fundamental rules on life.

Rule #1: Misery loves company. Anyone who is miserable, even if it's your own best friend will bring you down too. Keep your head up.

Rule #2: Forgive but never forget. Forgiveness is divine, but if you've screwed me in the past, you'll probably screw me again. And I ought to be ready, right?

Rule #3: The only people you can ever really trust is your immediate family. Sure, your friends care, and you boy/girlfriend loves you, but until they are the father/mother of your child, and you have a family of your own, they're still looking out for themselves.

Words to live by, Folks. Anyway, that's all for me. I'd love to hear from you...

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