I met Jessica a few years back as she was terrorizing AOL chatrooms and making the insolent pee their pants. As you might guess, it was love at first sight! So we got to talking about music, and she accidentally passed the most crucial test for anyone in my life: she LOVES Morrissey. I about died. As it turns out, we share so many of the same interests, views, and tastes. She likes Italy, I like Italy! She likes Hannibal Lecter, I like Hannibal Lecter! She thinks I'm cute, I think I'm cute! It's glorious!

We dated for most of 2002, and though that has ended, we remain the best of friends. To learn more about her, check out "The Winter of Our Discontent." Here are a few shots that you too might bask in her celestial glory (as she would undoubtedly say):

These days, you probably won't see her out chatting so much, but if you happen to catch up with her... and you're insolent... well, bring an extra pair of pants.

"Ciao."